The second batch of Good, Bad, and Cuddly contestants from The Masked Singer Season 7’s Group B made their debut Wednesday, and among the five celebrity cosplayers was the adorable, Keane-painting-eyed Lemur. Sadly, this pretty primate was the first eliminee from Group B, after her cover of Carole King’s “I Feel the Earth Move” failed to move the judges or voting audience. But the camera just loved the alluring Lemur, and understandably so: She turned out to be one of the most iconic supermodels of all time.
Based on the clues, the judges speculated that this might a famous rock-star wife, possibly Heather Locklear, Pamela Anderson, or Jerry Hall. But only Ken Jeong got it right — picking up on the clues package’s Vacation-reminiscent red convertible and mention of the word “Hart” (as in Roxie Hart). And so, Ken figured out that this was Chicago stage star and Billy Joel’s ex, superstar cover-girl Christie Brinkley.
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“That was your best guess in seven seasons!” an amazed Robin Thicke told Ken. (I suppose if the Lemur had covered “Uptown Girl” or had dressed as a Wally World Moose, it would have been more obvious.)
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And now there are four masks standing from Group B, but only one of them will move on to compete against Group A’s Firefly (who is probably Teyana Taylor) in the Season 7 finals. Who are these mystery Group B-listers? Let’s check out their performances and clues below.
Miss Teddy (Team Cuddly), “Tell It to My Heart”
This cute creature had a very familiar-sounding voice and could really belt — suffice to say, vocally she had nothing in common with Season 2’s similarly costumed Sarah “The Bear” Palin, and much more in common with the original “Tell It to My Heart” singer, Season 4’s Taylor “The Popcorn” Dayne. “What a way to open up the show!” exclaimed an impressed Jenny McCarthy-Wahlberg.
Clues: We saw beds and pillows, a laughing emoji, a director’s chair, Santa Claus, gospel choir gowns, and a caterpillar morphing into a butterfly — the latter clue because Miss Teddy is known for “constantly reinventing” herself.
Judges’ guesses: Lauryn Hill, Vanessa Williams, Kelly Rowland, Jill Scott, CeCe Winans, CeCe Peniston, Loretta Devine.
My guess: Nicole Scherzinger seemed convinced that this was Loretta, and the clues do add up. The gospel robes could be a play on the word “divine”; the bedtime clues could reference Dreamgirls (Loretta originated the role of Lorrell Robinson in that Broadway musical); the Santa could point to Loretta’s role in This Christmas; and Loretta has done both drama and comedy. I’m going to trust Nicole, the reigning Golden Ear champion, and go with the Devine Miss L as well.
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Hydra (Team Bad), “Hey Soul Sister”
Rolling up in what host Nick Cannon called the “most out-of-control costume” in the history of series, this triple-threat dragon emitted not just smoke and fire but also three very different cartoon-character singing voices, ranging from Spamalot-like dandyisms to Satchmo-style croaking. Everyone was floored. “What fairytale-land did we just step into?” gasped Nick.
Clues: We saw these “bad boys” chewing grape bubblegum and cavorting around Miami. Other visual clues included an ATM machine, water-skis, a boardwalk with a rollercoaster, a shark, and a Magic 8-Ball with the display “Ask Your Amigos.” One of the three Hydra-heads also gave Ken a special shoutout, saying this performance was “especially for” him.
Judges’ guesses: Ken was “getting a Will Smith vibe” — an interesting comment, given this week’s Oscar timing. (If it is Will, then Fox will have another PR disaster to contend with, along with that rumored, controversial Rudy Giuliani appearance.) The other judges guessed the Muppets’ Statler & Waldorf (hey, Kermit once sang on the show, so it’s possible); Big Lebowski stars Jeff Bridges, John Goodman, and Steve Buscemi; or Three Amigos comedians Chevy Chase, Steve Martin, and Martin Short.
My guess: I don’t think there are necessarily three people inside this three-headed serpent. I think this is just one man of a thousand voices… and I recognize one of those voices as being vaguely Ed Grimley-esque! I think is — finally! — one of the three amigos: Martin Short. Ken’s been desperate to have Martin on The Masked Singer since Season 1. (Side note: It would be really cool if Chevy Chase was in there, so that he and Christie the Lemur could have a little Vacation mini-reunion. That would be a real national lampoon!)
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Ringmaster (Team Good), “The Climb”
The circus freak’s mile-wide hoop skirt would make it tough to navigate the stage for any unseasoned performer. But the graceful Ringmaster floated across the set like a born entertainer. She had a big balladeer voice, too, which Nicole called “so beautiful and captivating.”
Clues: We saw books, cereal, Miley Cyrus’s face on a Montana map, “Sweet Southern” whiskey, a game of tic tac toe, and a Golden State driver’s license. The Ringmaster told Nicole, “It’s nice to see you again,” and then John Oates sent her a video message urging her to “make your dreams come true.”
Judges’ guesses: Olivia Rodrigo, Kacey Musgraves, Noah Cyrus, Kelly Clarkson. (These guesses were terrible!)
My guess: This mistress of ceremonies certainly doesn’t sound like the She & Him indie singer, but I’m going to make a wild guess and go with Zooey Deschanel. Zooey was born and raised in California and once worked on a secret project with Nicole, and Hall & Oates’s “You Make My Dreams Come True” did play during a key scene in (500) Days of Summer. Maybe Zooey has a whole other octave we never knew about!
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Armadillo (Team Good), “Secret Agent Man”
The growling, gruff, gold-plated critter gave off a pro-wrestler/action hero vibe. He’s clearly not a professional vocalist, but as Ken put it, he exuded the “presence of a legend” tonight.
Clues: He was “born on mountain and raised in a cave.” We saw rocks, hot dogs on a BBQ grill, sporty sunglasses, a bow and arrow, and a beefcake (as in, literally a cake made out of hamburger meat).
Judges’ guesses: Chuck Norris, Erik Estrada, Vin Diesel.
My guess: This is a stretch, but since I think this is a wrestler and the sunglasses were a notable clue, I’m going with late They Live star Rowdy Roddy Piper’s ‘80s nemesis, Hulk Hogan. The Hulk is not a bad singer, as this old Japanese commercial shows, and he did launch his wrestling career with his buddy Brutus Beefcake. Maybe the Armadillo can do a song by Rock ‘n’ Wrestling Connection spokeswoman Cyndi Lauper next time!
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