It’s not easy being Harry Styles’s plus-one — and he knows it.
In conversation with Rolling Stone, the British pop star and heartthrob, 28, talked about his fans’ relationship with his 38-year-old girlfriend, Olivia Wilde and how it’s been “difficult.” Wilde, who was directing him in Don’t Worry Darling when they started dating in late 2020, also chimed in with her own thoughts on about the “toxic negativity” they’ve been hit with.
“That obviously doesn’t make me feel good,” Styles said when asked about the hate directed at Wilde by a corner of his fandom. Fodder includes criticism over their age gap, some of her resurfaced past comments, her dancing skills at his concerts and accusations that she somehow stole Styles from fans.
The “As It Was” singer spoke of the boundaries he’s created between being a pop icon and his life out of the spotlight, from having a minimal social media presence to his ritual of showering immediately after each show to cleanse the “unnatural” adoration directed at him as a pop superstar and return him to his vulnerable, human form. But even with those boundaries, sometimes “other people blur the lines for you.”
“It’s obviously a difficult feeling to feel like being close to me means you’re at the ransom of a corner of Twitter or something,” he said. “I just wanted to sing. I didn’t want to get into it if I was going to hurt people like that.”
Wilde was asked about the fan hate for the article and and her response was described as diplomatic. She described his fandom generally as “deeply loving people” who have fostered an accepting community which is known for being a safe space where they can be themselves. However, she continued, “What I don’t understand about the cruelty you’re referencing is that that kind of toxic negativity is the antithesis of Harry, and everything he puts out there. I don’t personally believe the hateful energy defines his fan base at all. The majority of them are true champions of kindness.”
Styles talked about how the negativity has made for some awkward conversations in his life.
“Can you imagine going on a second date with someone and being like, ‘OK, there’s this corner of the thing, and they’re going to say this, and it’s going to be really crazy, and they’re going to be really mean, and it’s not real… But anyway, what do you want to eat?'”
He said his m.o. is and always has been to separate his public persona and personal life.
“I’ve never talked about my life away from work publicly and found that it’s benefited me positively,” he said. “There’s always going to be a version of a narrative, and I think I just decided I wasn’t going to spend the time trying to correct it or redirect it in some way.”
Styles also spoke about having children one day. Wilde has two with ex-fiancé Jason Sudeikis — and they’ve been spotted with their mom at Love on Tour shows.
“Well, if I have kids at some point, I will encourage them to be themselves and be vulnerable and share,” he said.
Elsewhere in the interview, Styles also addressed accusations of “queerbaiting.“
“Sometimes people say, ‘You’ve only publicly been with women,’ and I don’t think I’ve publicly been with anyone,” he said. “If someone takes a picture of you with someone, it doesn’t mean you’re choosing to have a public relationship or something.”
Styles and Wilde started dating in the fall of 2020 as they filmed Don’t Worry Darling during the pandemic. She split with Sudeikis — with whom she shares Otis, 8, and Daisy, 5 — around that time, and went public with Styles in January 2021. The film comes out Sept. 23.
Meanwhile, Wilde and Sudeikis are having a bitter custody dispute. He had her served while she was onstage at CinemaCon. He recently lost his bid to move their custody dispute battle to New York courts. A judge ruled custody must be determined in California, which was the children’s home state prior to the couple’s split. In the court docs, Sudeikis revealed Wilde plans to relocate from Los Angeles to London — Styles’s home base (he also has a home in L.A.) — after the end of the 2022-2023 school year next June.
