There is little that is more likely to enrage social media users than photographs of Russian oligarch’s yachts, bobbing aimlessly in some far-off port, while their billionaire owners deal with the latest round of Western sanctions triggered by Vladimir Putin’s decision to invade Ukraine.
In fact, the only sight more likely to infuriate a certain determined band of keyboard warriors is one of my latest updates for The Daily Telegraph about Boris Johnson’s plans for a new national flagship to replace HMY Britannia, decommissioned by Labour prime minister Tony Blair in 1997.
And this week, the two ideas came together, with critics of the new flagship suggesting that one of the oligarch’s yachts could provide a replacement for Britannia, saving the cash-strapped government hundreds of millions of pounds at the height of the cost-of-living crisis.
The idea is not so far-fetched as it seems, as in the late 1940s, a yacht formerly belonging to Adolf Hitler was even considered as an option to be repurposed to ferry around the British Royal family as replacement for Britannia’s royal yacht predecessor, HM Yacht Victoria & Albert.
Richard Johnson-Bryden, author of Britannia – the Official History, says: “The idea of converting an existing superyacht into an economic replacement royal yacht is nothing new.
“After the Second World War, a number of large motor yachts were evaluated as economic replacements for HMY Victoria & Albert, including the German yacht Grille, which was described as Hitler’s ‘royal yacht’, even though no evidence existed at the time to prove that Hitler used her in such a capacity.”
George VI, the Queen’s father, then made it clear that he would “accept a rebuilt Grille, if there was no other way of giving him a seagoing yacht”, Johnson-Bryden says.
A further option was Turkey’s desire to sell the yacht Savarona, purchased for Mustafa Kemal Atatürk, the late president.
None of these schemes came to fruition – the Savarona was used as a navigational training ship before she was restored to her rightful position as Turkey’s presidential yacht – and in 1952, the UK government ordered that HMY Britannia be built.
The idea of commandeering an oligarch’s super yacht and repurposing it is, of course, a non-starter: the legality of seizing one, perhaps as a spoil of war, is far from clear.
And, indeed, members of the Royal family might refuse to board any yacht associated with oligarchs’ ill-gotten gains.
The modest and relatively frugal interiors of Britannia, which were designed by the late Duke of Edinburgh, also pale against the vulgar opulence of an oligarch’s yacht. That would mean that millions of pounds would probably have to be spent “de-blinging” the interior.
Out would go the gold-plated lavatory paper holders and the tiled dancefloor, in would come the floral patterned furniture, Tupperware boxes in the galley and – of course – quarters for the corgis.
According to Johnson-Bryden, the “fitting of a more modest interior would likely be high up on a long list of changes” to make a seized super-yacht fit for our Queen – along with the hurried dropping of “toys”, such as large inflatable water slides, submarines and jet skis: “Converting a yacht that was built as an ostentatious display of wealth and optimised for pleasure would require a pretty extensive package of work to transform it into the proposed national flagship.”
All of this will soon be superfluous as the Ministry of Defence’s plans for the actual £250 million national flagship are well advanced, and are due to be unveiled in mid-May.
The early signs are that the actual design of the national flagship – which the Royal family has so far distanced itself from – will make talk of a new luxury royal yacht redundant.
One source familiar with the plans told me: “You would be hard-pressed to find anything on this ship that looks like recreational luxury.”
In other words, the critics will have to stop carping. Which is perhaps just as well.
